7 MINUTES Review

Release Date: June 26, 2015 (Limited and VOD)
Director: Jay Martin
MPAA Rating: NR
Run Time: 92 min.

7 Minutes is the title of a new crime thriller from writer-director Jay Martin, but it’s also about the same amount of time it took for me to lose interest in this film (couldn’t resist the zing). This paint-by-numbers heist flick channels Guy Ritchie and Quentin Tarantino at times but lacks the charm and style of those directors, opting for a more generic approach that results in a bland, forgettable movie going experience.

The plot centers around three amateur criminals who decide to rob someone who previously robbed someone else of $500,000 after they bungled a drug deal and found themselves owing a psychopathic Molly supplier close to $70K. The heist itself takes, get this, 7 minutes, but the film periodically shifts its point of view to different characters involved, attempting to flesh out the backstory in (what appears to be) the most convoluted way possible.

This structure ends up being just one issue I had with 7 Minutes. Before the story shifts to each person’s own life, we see his or her name plastered in giant letters on the screen, a method that doesn’t work stylistically – as we already know who that character is when his or her name pops up. It just adds to the messiness of the storytelling, which jumps all over the place and follows people we barely see throughout the film. Moreover, other than the main character, Sam (Luke Mitchell), the other two guys, Mike and Owen (played by Jason Ritter and Zane Holtz, respectively) actually felt underdeveloped.

This is the type of film where I kept asking myself throughout, “Why does this exist? What is the purpose of this movie?” If it’s to entertain, then this isn’t working; if it’s to present a unique story, it doesn’t; and if it’s to show interesting characters, it’s lacking.

It’s not that this film looked bad or featured poor performances from the cast; everyone does a serviceable job, but 7 Minutes is a nothing of a film. It’s a cookie-cutter heist flick that acts like it’s a complex Tarantino film interwoven with storylines and characters, but there’s nothing here to interweave.

In the end, it’s just about a bunch of dickheads who screw up a robbery. And honestly, how cool can you be if, as in one scene, the characters are all standing around, pointing their guns at the camera with an Alkaline Trio shirt hanging on the wall?