‘The ABCs of Death’ Review

Release Date: March 8th, 2013
Currently Playing on VOD Platforms
Directors: Click Here
MPAA Rating: NR
Film Pulse Score: 5/10

The ABCs of Death is an ambitious horror anthology that takes 26 directors from around the world and tasks them with making a short film based on a letter of the alphabet.  The result is something of a mixed bag that ends up leaving much to be desired.  Because the segments range from brilliant to garbage, for the purposes of this review, we’ll take a similar approach to the film and break it down into 26 mini reviews.

Part of the fun for some people is trying to guess the word while the short is playing, so if you don’t want the names spoiled, it’s best to read this review after you’ve seen the movie.

A is for Apocalypse – Nacho Vigalondo

The film starts off with a bloody bang in this segment directed by Nacho Vigalondo (Time Crimes).  The back and forth camera shots are great and there’s some serious gore. The story is decent as well, with a nice twist at the end, however if you know the word before seeing it, you’ll know what’s coming.

B is for Bigfoot – Adrian Garcia Bogliano

Here’s a fairly straightforward boogyman tale and I’m not quite sure why they didn’t just name it “Boogyman.”  This is the first of the names that don’t really match with the story. It is violent but there’s not a lot of substance here and nothing really unique.

C is for Cycle – Ernesto Diaz Espinoza

This would have been a very interesting concept, had Nacho Vigalondo not done it before in Time Crimes. This is one that seemed a little too ambitious for the time constraints and probably could have used a few more minutes to develop the plot a bit.

D is for Dogfight – Marcel Sarmiento

By far, this is the best looking of the bunch and it had a very unique premise as well.  The entire short was done in slow motion with no dialogue and it had something of a music video feel to it.  This will be the highlight for most people that see this movie.

E is for Exterminate – Angela Bettis

There were some humorous moments in this segment involving a spider getting revenge on his would-be killer, but the poor CG and subpar video quality bring it down to nothing more than tolerable. To its credit, it is more tolerable than some of the future segments.

F is for Fart – Noboru Iguchi

If you’ve seen any of Iguchi’s previous films like Machine Girl, you’ll have an idea what you’re in for here.  The only difference is this is way more ridiculous than Machine Girl was in even its craziest moments. It’s horrible.

G is for Gravity – Andrew Traucki

In this POV short, Australian director Andrew Traucki seems like he couldn’t be bothered by making anything remotely substantial.  This segment is shorter than most, and feels fairly pointless.

H is for Hydro-Electric Diffusion – Thomas Malling

More goofy than most, this strange cartoon-like short featured people in dog costumes who were in World War II.  While some may enjoy the creative visuals, I found it to be entirely too off the wall and creepy.

I is for Ingrown – Jorge Michel Grau

Though it is deeply disturbing, there wasn’t much of a point to this segment either, other than to show a horrific death. When writing this review I had to actually go back and look this one up because I forgot about it completely.

J is for Jidai-geki – Yudai YamaGuchi

Here’s another odd one from Japan.  There’s not much to this and it’s fairly asinine but it’s fairly short so it’s not that bad.

K is for Klutz – Anders Morgenthaler

I really enjoyed the animation style of this one, it’s just a shame that the segment itself was so stupid.  I’m not sure how fighting with a turd makes one a klutz but then again I don’t really care.

L is for Libido – Timo Tjahjanto

This segment is by far the most horrific to watch and crosses the line several times throughout.  The director, Timo Tjahjanto (Macabre) seemed to take a clue from films like Hostel and A Serbian Film and mash them up into a revolting piece of trash that was both offensive and disturbing. The director should be ashamed for making this.

M is for Miscarriage – Ti West

I’m a big fan of Ti West, and I thought his last two features, The innkeepers and The House of the Devil, were great.  This short however, is not.  This is an extremely disappointing and pointless film that seemed like the director simply phoned it in.

N is for Nuptials – Banjon Pisanthanakun

This was one of the few segments that I thought was funny in a clever way.  It’s simple and to the point, but it was way more enjoyable that most of the other shorts.

O is for Orgasm – Helene Cattet

I’m not really sure this qualifies as a horror story, it’s more of an art piece than anything.  It’s just a mish-mash of symbolic imagery as a woman apparently dies whilst having an orgasm.

P is for Pressure – Simon Rumley

This segment has a very serious tone and feels slightly out of place compared to the other shorts.  I was actually taken aback by how sad this actually was, until it went more into a shock film by the end. Still, I find this to be one of the stronger entries in the series.

Q is for Quack – Adam Wingard

Here’s another promising young director that I’m a big fan of and while this was way better than Ti West’s, there was still not a lot going on here.  I do give some bonus points to Wingard for coming up with an interesting concept for the letter Q though.

R is for Removed – Srdjan Spasojevic

This is another more artistic piece exploring the nature of film itself.  I liked the concept of this one, but the time constraints really prevented it from being fleshed out.

S is for Speed – Jake West

Here’s another one that’s heavy on symbolism, similar in concept to Lovely Molly. I found this to be more enjoyable than Lovely Molly however, and more passable than most of the others.

T is for Toilet – Lee Hardcastle

This Claymation short was the winner of a contest that was held back in 2011 when this project was first being put together.  You can actually view this segment online for free as well.  As for the segment itself, I thoroughly enjoyed it and thought that even though the Claymation was rough looking, it had a classic feel to it.

U is for Unearthed – Ben Wheatley

Another one of my favorites, this POV short is unique, chaotic, and bloody. The quality was great and the segment had a much more polished feel than most of the others.  Since Kill List, Ben Wheatley remains one of my directors to watch and he didn’t let me down with this short.

V is for Vagitus – Kaare Andrews

I enjoyed the special effects in this, but it felt like there was simply too much story here to cram it into a 4 minute short. Also, it featured more lens flares than a J.J. Abrams film.

W is for WTF – Jon Schnepp

Jon Schnepp is most known for creating the Adult Swim show Metalocalypse, so I was hoping for a cool animated segment and it started out that way, but quickly devolved into a complete mess.

X is for XXL – Xavier Gens

Xavier Gens is kind of a hit or miss director for me.  I loved Frontier(s) however last year’s The Tall Man was an extreme disappointment. X is for XXL was one of the better segments, but it was incredibly hard to watch and insanely gory.

Y is for Youngbuck – Jason Eisener

I’m a sucker for revenge tales so I was into this one, although again, deeply disturbing.

Z is for Zetsumetsu – Yoshihiro Nishimura

I would expect nothing less from the director of such Japanese classics as Meatball Machine and Tokyo Gore Police. Gross, violent, overly sexual, and not very enjoyable to watch.

So there you have it, not a very enjoyable movie watching experience overall, however there were some diamonds in the rough.  For horror fans I would still recommend checking this out, only because it’s an ambitious project with some great directors attached, and it has some seriously shocking moments.